Wholesome pun acquired by Big Word, radicalizes fans against capitalism
The brutal overnight sale of the internet’s favorite pun to a corporate media machine has many seeing red eyes – literally and figuratively. Awakened by Big Word’s nefarious schemes, netizens said enough was enough. Capitalism could be tolerated until now, when everything essential to survival was on fire, but from that day on, nothing. Gone are the days of small shared pleasures that continue to be accessible, somewhat under another name. Indeed, this has been strike six, and it’s time to draw the line. There’s no more big fish to fry, because it’s the biggest of them all. With the new revolutionary spirit, all those who were rather concerned about the state of affairs fiercely took matters into their own hands and stirred up a mass of action overnight. The world will never be the same again.
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The government allocates the entire budget to the industry and leaves only good vibes for human well-being
In its recently announced budget for the new year, the government showed that it not only had a vision for 2020, but also for 2022. The new plan is so progressive that the government was able to move very quickly from the issue of money for useful things. And after giving everything to big industries, the approach to people’s well-being is radical, vibes–based on a model that will inject growth into people’s well-being like nothing else. The government promises lots of life, laughter and love over the coming year, and will work to keep morale high with nationwide exercises like applause and plate slapping.
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Feminism wins biggest win with cartoon mouse swapping her dress for pants
Image credit: Disney Paris FR on Twitter
To usher in Women’s History Month, a media company known for its historically questionable portrayals of women has turned over a new leaf with its longest-serving character. A cartoon mouse, known for his iconic role as SpouseMT of a more famous cartoon mouse, swapped her red polka dot dress for a pantsuit. That’s right, Women’s History Month has never been more drastic than in 2022, when the world officially ran out of things to remember about women and all was finally well. The pantsuit – a navy polka dot suit – was designed by a very famous designer and was a labor of love that would have spent five whole minutes in Microsoft Paint. Mouse’s husband is shaking and Mouse’s marriage would have been strained with these new developments. But we’re supporting a boss mouse who can wear pants in a real suit, unlike her husband who hangs around in shorts all day. Get together man.
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Korean Zombie Horror Is Now The Most Realistic High School Take
There are a few high school television shows on the air, all claiming to represent an authentic depiction of the experience. But none can resist a new Korean show about a school zombie outbreak forcing kids to come of age or die. Zombies are pretty happy with the realistic depiction of zombiehood, and high school kids are pretty happy with the accurate portrayal of blood, guts, and gore, which is how adolescence feels. Awards juries are speculated to nominate it in the “documentary” category, for how it depicts true high school horror – particularly when adults throw children under the bus as the world rushes rapidly towards its end.
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World’s second richest man shuts down publishing house to raise money for Next Space Joyride
He may be a billionaire to beat all the billionaires, but he still isn’t the billionaire to beat all billionaires. This title belongs to a certain Peel-on Rusk, and it’s very sad. This billionaire in particular is upset. But with the unrivaled innovation and bold attitude that skyrocketed him to the top of the economic power chain, our second favorite rich tech man had a rich tech blueprint. The plan was to shut down a small publishing house that was worth less than his spare change, so he could raise funds for a small screw in his trusty spaceship. The missing screw was indeed worth a lot of money, and the billionaire’s plans to outdo the other billionaire-who-must-not-be-named in the race to continue needlessly visiting space would have gone awry, s ‘there had not been the timely sale of a house of knowledge and literature. The loss is regretted, but overall necessary for humanity – we’d all be better off with more billionaires building space toys and fewer books. At 451 degrees Fahrenheit, this bad boy became the hotshot he was destined to be.